Tuesday, February 17, 2015

Weight Watchers Update

So since my husband and I collectively decided we were done having kids a while back I finally got with the program....no literally, I jumped back on the Weight Watchers bandwagon that I fell off of 11 years ago and busted my a...nyway....and have embarked on what will be a looooong weight loss journey.

Actually, I did Nutrisystem for a few months back in the Fall and I lost 15 lbs, but after the new year I decided to start back up with WW since I already had the Points Plus program.

I'm happy to report at the end of week four I've lost an additional 7 lbs. I'm a slow loser, but I'm ok with that.

Since my highest weight I'm down 30 pounds! I'd lost a few here and there before NS.

Oh, annnnd I jogged my first full mile today. I know that's not much but I was tickled. No one was chasing me and I wasn't running after the ice cream truck HEEEYYY!! I usually walk 3 to 4 miles every day. I can not wait to get back outside and ditch the treadmill. I need that vitamin D y'all. Cold, snow, & ice is killin' my buzz!

So here's to another week on plan. Let's get it done!

Sunday, April 13, 2014

How to create a substitute teacher binder and all that jazz

Holy skin tight shorts, Batman.  I haven't posted since January??  Don't get all up in my grill.  I've been busy with life...mmkay?

So I decided to get my Substitute Teaching license so I could legally spy on my kids instead of parking across the street with binoculars.



  Not about the sub license.  I totally got that.  I'm all set for subbing in the Fall for the new school year.  It seemed like the logical part time job for me.  I'll have the same work schedule as the kids with all the same holidays, vacations, and bad weather days.  I've actually been meaning to do this for several years, but just kept putting it on the back burner.  Or maybe I was just too dang lazy.  Same thing.

I've even played around with going back to school for an Associates Degree in Child Development which would qualify me for Teaching Aid and Head Start teaching.  We'll see.  I may be pushing 40, but I still got game.

So I did my orientation, paper work, and Cogent finger printing.....and in case you're wondering I came back clean.  Shocker.  I know.

Then I put together a Substitute Teacher's binder.  I wanted something that would have all the paper work I needed handy.  Something I could grab really quick and haul with me because I'm always organized. Ya feel me?

Thought I'd share what I came up with so you too could be an anal retentive douche and show up the other subs.

I grabbed a cheap white binder at Dollar General. 

Cute "My Teacher is Missing" free lesson printables!

I found free printables around the web (credits at the end of post)
Then laminated and inserted them into clear covers for durability.
Tabbed them for easy finding.

Added in all the info given to us at the looooong azz orientation.
Like freakin' two hours long.

I also bought a pencil bag with binder rings, pens, and stickers to snap in.

I was sure to print out several lesson plans to add in just in case a teacher called on short notice and didn't have time to leave me any plans for the day.  I also sectioned off areas for sub notes to leave at the end of the day. Also, emergency plans and contact info for each school and classroom.

So that's how I'm rollin'.  Y'all wish me luck.  If they've seen the way I'm raising my kids I may never get work.



Emily Wean

My Teacher is Missing:
Made by J. Enns

Thursday, January 16, 2014

Organizing School and Art Work

Anybody else suffer from a crap load of school work?

 I love being organized.  I can't think straight if I'm not.  When it comes to my kids though, I'm a total hoarder.  All of my cabinets, drawers, closets....all organized.  However, my weakness is my children.  It pains me to toss anything from their childhood.  I have managed to greatly reduce infant and toddler items.....sold all the big things and most clothes.  This one closet though, is still full of sweet reminders from the past eleven years.  

One of those reminders being every piece of school and art work that has come home for the past five years. Yikes!!  I couldn't take it anymore so I finally decided to tackle it.  It took two days to sift through it all, but I did it.  Yay!

I found these two bins at Walmart for $8 each and picked up some hanging file folders to go with them.  I filled the bins with files and made tabs for Kindergarten through 12th grade.

I know some moms make copies of art work so the big things don't take up much room, but I don't have the heart.  I like keeping originals.  I tried to keep just what the kids and I really liked.  Looks a little messy, but hey, that's my chitlins y'all!

I used some of my scrapbook supplies and my daughter's 1st grade picture for the front.  I know there's many of you who are more talented and creative, but me....not so much.  So I just spruced up the front with scrapbook paper and quotes.

On the front of each file folder I placed my child's class picture (with their classmates and teacher - which turned out great because I didn't know what the heck to do with those class photos)  and small annual picture for that year.

(wook at that wittle sweet face!)

Now I'm all set for the next eleven years!  Now on to the rest of the closet.......

Sunday, October 6, 2013

I'm not cool anymore

I found out I'm not cool anymore when I dropped the kids off at school Friday morning.

While the kids were getting out of the car I said, "BUH BAM!  It's Friday.  HOLLER!"  I also added in a high pitched, "CAN I GET A WHAT WHAAAAT?" and did a two handed raise the roof gesture for good measure.

Now, I don't know if I just did it out of order or if maybe I left out an extra "whaaaat," but my ten year old son and my seven year old daughter {who were furiously glancing back and forth to make sure no one was watching} looked back at me as they were slamming the van door shut and whispered.....

"Not cool mom.  Not.  Cool.  You are so.....{wait for it}......yesterday.....and embarrassing."

Watching them walk off I saw a brief bonding moment between siblings as they looked at each other with pity in their eyes.  Shaking their heads as if mentally conveying to each other how sad it must be to be so old and not know any better.

I see this look a lot from him

I was stunned.

My children didn't want to be seen with me.  When did this happen???  When did I become the object of rolling eyeballs and disown-ment?  They used to laugh and think how fun and hip I was when I would do all that urban slangy stuff.  True, I never knew the meaning of a single word I was saying, but that didn't matter to them.  I was the crazy cool mom who they loved hanging with.  I was their.....home slice. See? Total coolness.

back when they still loved me

Then, with a heavy heart, I realized.  They're growing up.  I'm not my daughter's BFF anymore.  Even though when she was five she pinky swore she always would be.  I'm not my son's best buddy or his partner in crime.  They've moved on.  They don't want their mom trying to be cool in front of all their little friends.  I seem to have missed the signs of them slowly letting go because I was too busy desperately trying to hold on to the tiny little hands I felt slipping away.  I knew they still loved me, but things just weren't the same as they used to be.  I was going to have to learn to adjust.

All day I debated on what to do.  Do I back off?  Should I disappear when other kids their age were around??  How could I change so they wouldn't be constantly upset and anxiously waiting for what humiliating thing their mother might do to embarrass them?

On the other hand......

Didn't I deserve to act however the heck I wanted to after nine months of morning sickness and 24 hours of labor and delivery??......After endless sleepless nights pacing back and forth with sick babies? Worrying over every cough, green poopy diaper, whimper, fever, scraped knee, tree licked, yes, that happened, and countless poison control calls that could have easily ended up with DHR at our doorstep???  Wasn't this MY right as a parent??  Didn't I deserve to have some fun at their expense???

That afternoon as I walked out the door to pick them up I knew what had to be done.

I got into the van and calmly drove to the school.

This was it.  The turning point in our relationship.  The moment they knew how the rest of their childhood and teen years would play out in front of friends, teachers, faculty, parents, and even strangers.  It all came down to this one defining moment between mother and child.

You could hear the music thumping in the car before I ever made it to the gate.

Here we go.  Game on.

A sea of young faces turned to see what the commotion was.

As my kids and I made eye contact a slow smile spread across my face, and their confusion quickly turned into an expression of horror.

My eyes narrowed as I rhythmically bobbed my head up and down to the beat of the music.

Their mouths gaped open in an effort to form a slow motion, "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" 

I could make out kids mouthing the words, "No. Way."

And that's when it happened.

The mother of all humiliation.....I pulled up in front of them with windows rolled down, van shaking, singing and rapping as loud as I could to the 1980's classic, "Ice Ice Baby".....with an added bonus of every dance move I've ever learned since 1979.  It was all there.....the Travolta moves, the Cabbage Patch, the Carlton, the Macarena.........

"Mama's in the hooouuussse!!" I squealed.

Their faces registered panic, then shock, and finally disbelief.  They were stone.  cold.  frozen.

As the teacher slid open the door I got,  "WHAT ARE YOU DOING???"  growled out through gritted teeth.  "I'm collaborating and listening.  Isn't it awesome??  Got my hands in the aiiiirr like I just don't caaaarrrree....."  

 They looked at me and I saw their little defeated faces.  Grudgingly I got a nod of ..... "Well played, mother. Well played."

Crawling into the van they slithered down as low as they could into the seats.  My little girl looked up at her big brother and said, "Did that really just happen?  Is this a dream??"

Sharing an understanding wink with the other moms I pulled out of the line.

Still grinning as we drove off I said, "Oh no honey, this is your worst nightmare.  Welcome to the next ten years."

And that, moms, is how it's done.


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